Friend Zone – 09/27/2013

Slow day at work so I guess that means it’s time to blog.  Last night I got a text from a friend requesting that I should come thru and work on her laptop.  Normally this would be harmless except for the fact that it was 10 pm and immediately after asking she threw in a few sexual innuendos.  Now anyone who knows me knows that when it comes to the opposite sex I am a little slow on noticing any interest.  I either figure they are joking or blind so in order for me to pick up on those “signals” it has to be pretty blatant and obvious.  So back to my convo last night, I laughed it off and gave my usual response “smh” then I ended the convo and took my ass to bed. The friend zone for whatever reason is viewed negatively.  I guess I can see the reasons why.  Some people get placed in that zone even though they are trying to be more to the person than a friend.  Then of course instead of saying fuck it and leaving the person alone you torture yourself and stay in the zone hoping they see how great you are…or when their significant other slips up.  Which leads to that other aspect of the friend zone, whoever you guys are dating lmao.  The GF/bf of the person who has someone in the friend zone hates that person because they know they have ulterior motives.  Of course yall can’t see that (“Nah he/she is just my good friend, they don’t like me like that”).  I look at it differently the friend zone can be a nice place, if it is mutual and if you are the one initiating the friend zone ha.  Having a few female friends can be helpful, I mean I know they have helped me get in clubs before, helped me get other girls, jobs, etc.  It’s mutually beneficial for them also because I consider myself a good friend so at the least, I can help you move or let you borrow $20 dollars or some shit.  See everybody wins.  A lifelong friend instead of some male or female you dated for a few months that you no longer speak to anymore.  Give me the friend. Ok here is where I give you guys some examples of what happened to me.  I have been in relationships with a few female friends and man they ended…kind of fast.  Dated someone I was friends with for years and it started off great.  Saw each other every week, traveled, and met the family, the whole nine.  Shit was sweet until she started complaining about me not being able to give her more time.  Long story short a 4 or 5-year friendship ended and we don’t even speak anymore.  Shit, I don’t even get random booty calls from her anymore when she is in town smh.  Another example, I was friends with a female and everything was cool.  I was feeling her so like an idiot I kept trying to push a relationship on her and she finally agreed.  Man, I don’t think we lasted a month lmao.  We are somewhat cordial now but it’s not even close to the way that it used to be. There are some other stories where I crossed the line with friends only physically and well this is how that works.  Me: You sure you want to do this because it may change things.  Her: Nothing will change, I can handle it. Me: You sure? Her: Yes.  Then after y’all do it a few times she gets mad when you treat her same as you always had.  So um yeah more friends lost. I hear the saying “you should be friends before lovers” but it should be “just because we are great friends it doesn’t mean we should be lovers”.  Let me get off my soapbox though, I’ll just keep my lifelong female friend, my big head ass sister.  Oh shit, just realized the epic friendship zone fail.  My son’s mother. (Even though I thank God for my son) Lmaooooo.  I forgot we were friends first, and then we were together a few years, had a kid and broke up a few years later. Man look, I’m never dating another friend again smh.   Friend zone for life!

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