2017 · Dating/Relationships · Uncategorized

Work spouses…

You know what makes me feel the most hopeless about relationships? The workplace.

I don’t flirt at work or really in general. Not because I have this higher moral code or something but mainly because I suck at it lol. There is also the fact that I like to be as professional as possible. Especially in my line of work, the joys of contracting lol.

There’s a time and a place for everything and I just feel as if the workplace is one of those places where this isn’t acceptable. Hell, I don’t care how fine she is I can honestly say that I wouldn’t even attempt to date a coworker. Of course, I wasn’t always this way and I had a few slip ups in my 20s. Shockingly not all ended terribly but it’s not for me, never again.

Hell, I wouldn’t even want to work with my significant other or spouse. Ask my Mom about working with a spouse? I don’t know how my parents didn’t get a divorce during those years lol.

It’s hilarious. I come into work, keep my headphones in my ear, rarely leave my desk except to get water or use the restroom. Keep it quiet and I dress like a substitute shop teacher as not to draw attention to myself. Ok, the main reason that I dress this way is that it is cost efficient, comfortable and I have zero fashion sense but let’s push this other narrative. Also as long as it is clean and not too wrinkled, I will wear it. My point is, even by acting and looking this way women will still attempt to flirt or talk to me… even if they aren’t single and even though I am doing my best to ignore them smh.

This is partially why observing my coworkers makes me feel hopeless at times. Where I work, well my current contract, the workplace is predominately women. If I were to base it off of what I have seen, the ratio of women to men is probably 5:1. Great odds for men, I can’t lie. Now out of those 5, I would say that probably 3 of the women are in relationships. Also out of those 5 women, I would say 4 probably flirt and the 1 who doesn’t is either too old, not attractive enough to someone or actually values their relationship lol.

It is soo bad. Some say flirting is harmless and some say flirting is cheating. I don’t know, that’s up to each individual. Personally, I call flirting a gateway drug lol. It leads to cheating. Not always but more often than not it does. Think about it? You are around your coworkers roughly 40 hours a week. Forgive me but you know I have to break that down. There are 168 hours a week. We established that you work 40, let’s say you sleep 42 hours a week, then add maybe 6 hours just based off of a commute. That leaves about 80 hours to be with your significant other. Heaven forbids if you workout, have kids or do something else. It is safe to say that some of you will spend more time with your coworkers than your significant other. Because it is work they will usually look nice and act somewhat professional. As you get to know them and be around them all the time, there is a chance that you may like them. Not necessarily in a sexual way but they may seem cool or as a friend. Then we throw in flirting. No this isn’t that Criminal Minds type flirting where Shamar Moore flirts with that Garcia lady and it only works because he isn’t really attracted to her and she knows she has no chance with him. This workplace type flirting is usually because there is a level of attraction between both people. So now there is a physical attraction, you actually like the person’s personality and then it happens. You confide in each other. He complains about his nagging woman, paints her in such a bad light that you start feeling sorry for him. Better yet, maybe she confides in you about her lazy man, who can’t keep employment or isn’t treating her right. One thing leads to another and Boom! Yall fuckin.

So back to your coworkers. Because it is work they will usually look nice and act somewhat professional. As you get to know them and be around them all the time, there is a chance that you may like them. Not necessarily in a sexual way but they may seem cool or as a friend. Then we throw in flirting. No this isn’t that Criminal Minds type flirting where Shamar Moore flirts with that Garcia lady and it only works because he isn’t really attracted to her and she knows she has no chance with him. This workplace type flirting is usually because there is a level of attraction between both people. So now there is a physical attraction, you actually like the person’s personality and then it happens. You confide in each other. He complains about his nagging woman, who doesn’t dress like you or look like you, act like you and paints her in such a bad light that you start feeling sorry for him. Then maybe she confides in you about her lazy man, who can’t keep employment or isn’t treating her right or doesn’t dress like you or travel or whatever. Hell, some weeks the closest thing that you will get to a date is going to lunch with your co-worker. So when all of this adds up, the relationship is getting rocky, one thing leads to another and then Boom! Yall fuckin.

Lol, and I’m not even going to get into that whole emotional cheating thing. You telling your coworker things before me or things that you should tell me? Oh boy smh.

See at least I kind of gave some half ass reasons that led to cheating earlier. It doesn’t get that deep out here lol. People just be fuckin each other because they want to. I have flat out heard women and men say they have no issue with their spouses or significant others, say they are great and will still mess with coworkers because they like them, their “swag” or they find them attractive. Really? Just the hell with self-control huh?

It is so awkward when employees bring their significant other into work and you know someone else is smashing them. They out here introducing him or her to everyone, meanwhile, the person they mess with is sitting with a smirk on their face or if they are really bold they will actually come up and talk to them.

See, this is why people get killed. I’ll never forget my days working in security (and pray that I never go back lol). My job used to be scary as Hell. Especially once the significant other would find out about cheating in the workplace. It never failed, either the threats would come out to the job or the person would report the potential of someone coming out to the job and I would have to be on alert. What was funny is that I had to listen to people lying and saying they didn’t do anything. How did I know they were lying? Simple, I would see half of the foul stuff happening on camera daily.

Work husband/wife my ass smh. I wouldn’t even consider myself insecure but damn. When you see something so often you can’t help but be a little skeptical or have your antennas up. It’s just human nature. In the meantime can y’all please stop smashing your co-workers? Lol.

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