Nonchalant 

Why are you so laid back and nonchalant?

If I had a dollar for everytime someone asked me that I could at least buy a plan B pill…

Judge your, nah judge me I don’t care lol.

My point is, I hear this quite often. People say that as if it means that I don’t care. I laugh because that’s far from what it means.

First of all, it is an incorrect assessment of who I am. Ok, I can admit that at times I can be indifferent and not the most enthusiastic brother around but even then I think it is all part of the process of getting to know someone. If I were head over heels about every single woman I met? Could you imagine?

I think women should look at it as a sign of strength, maturity, and composure. It’s a sign that “hey if shit hits the fan I know this dude has enough composure not to panic, be logical and deal with whatever issue may come our way “.

It also means that if you do something effed up or disrespectful to him there is a good chance that he will react maturely and won’t be violent or petty.

I used to always hear, “why didn’t you fight for me” and in my head I would think, Hell, just be glad that I was so level headed that  “I didn’t fight you at all” smh.

Lol because that’s the thing. Why does it seem that borderline crazy is more attractive than composure to some?

It’s cute until he is blowing up your phone, making threats and stalking you, huh? Lol.

I would never say this to a woman I was in a relationship with but I used to think if I’m this “nonchalant” with you imagine how bad it is with other women? Lol, my point being that this temperament isn’t that attractive. Even to the most persistent potential side chick. Women have egos too lol and speaking from personal experience they get the hint pretty quickly and leave my ass alone lol. That rejection hurts. Hell, me being this way helps our relationship lol.

Now obviously, there needs to be a decent balance and often times nonchalant means that I don’t care. You just have to figure out when that is.

I have a very logical reason for my nonchalant behavior. Besides being a very logical person and my upbringing at some point in my adult life I realized that adults will do what they want to do. You can’t make anyone do anything and if you do “make” them, it probably won’t last for a long period of time. I have also learned that rejection is a part of life. A broken heart hasn’t killed me yet so I think I will be ok if someone doesn’t want me. I also know that it is up to me to show whoever I am with how I express myself

I get it though ladies. it can be frustrating to deal with a laid back guy because hell, sometimes you may not even know if he is feeling you. That is where the onus lies on him. He should at least, at some point explain how he expresses himself so you can at least have an idea lol.

So yeah go find you a laid back guy, like me. Like me as in similar, not me specifically lol.

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