As a boring man, I fully understand why women complain about dating or dealing with boring men.
Just look at the definition and synonyms associated with the word boring.
Boring – not interesting; tedious.
Synonyms: tedious, dull, monotonous, repetitive, unrelieved, unvaried, unimaginative, uneventful;
characterless, featureless, colorless, lifeless, insipid, uninteresting, unexciting, uninspiring, unstimulating, uninvolving; unreadable, unwatchable; jejune, flat, bland, dry, stale, tired, banal, lackluster, stodgy, vapid, monochrome, dreary, humdrum, mundane;mind-numbing, wearisome, tiring, tiresome, irksome, trying, frustrating; informal deadly, ho-hum, dullsville, dull as dishwater, plain-vanilla
Man look, characterless? lifeless? irksome? Ho-hum? Well damn, am I that bad?
By fully understanding the meaning of the word boring, I understand how it can be problematic. This is why I am always so upfront with women about it. I add it to my long list of the not so positive things about me. Lol, I tend to highlight my negative traits, in the beginning, more so than the positive for whatever reason smh lol. I guess if you let them know and they still deal with you, whatever happens, or doesn’t happen is their fault.
I think when I tell women I am boring they tend to overlook this detail at first or think that it is something minor when in all honesty this is a major part of a relationship.
This is why you hear so many people break up and/or on a lesser level cheat, minus the fact that people who cheat did it because they want to. The use the excuse or reason that things got routine or boring, a lack of a spark, no fun, and not as stimulating. Which is totally a justifiable reason to leave someone.
I’ll never forget, as one of my exes was giving me the “we need a break” speech she told me some hurtful shit. Not hurtful enough to change who I am… obviously but just hurtful because it was true and it came from someone I cared about. She told me that she wasn’t worried about me doing anything in regards to stepping out or whatever. I know some of you are like that’s a good thing, it sounds like she trusted you but Nah, she never used the word trust, she was saying I’m not even worried that your lame ass is going anywhere and if you did it wouldn’t bother me much. As a strong 6, I must say that I was offended lol. She then explained how things had got so routine, mundane and boring that she dreaded the daily convo, felt no spark and was just going through the motions. See this is why I am ok with women ghosting me, just vanish, don’t tell me why you don’t want me anymore. Ok, where was I? Oh yeah, this woman basically telling me why she had checked out.
Lol, and to make matters worse she began the convo explaining all of my great attributes first. Nothing more frustrating than someone telling you that you did everything right but they basically still aren’t happy or don’t want you smh. I will also admit that during the conversation I did something I was ashamed of. I tried to reason with her, asked what I could do to make things work, even told her I could change. Yeah, I embraced my inner R&B, baby please, begging, Keith Sweat on.
She did play along for a few weeks and act as if it were something we could work through but eventually, I snapped out of it. Stopped doing everything and then we unfollowed each other on social media which really means it’s the end lol. 😂
I did learn quite a few things from this interaction. Mainly that I was boring, but to be myself, and never beg someone to want to be with me or take me back. Ironically, this is why I side-eye every woman who asks men shit like “why didn’t you fight for me” after they ended or suggested ending things. Maybe it’s the pride talking but it’s just something about having to ask or persuade someone to want you back or to stay with you. I dead ass felt like my soul was leaving when I was trying to make things work with my ex. Not saying I knock those that do it but I don’t ever see myself being in that situation again. Nope.